Blog Me Oh My

Dull life or struggle for a fulfilling life

Its been 9 months since graduation; no relevant job in my chosen career path. Just drifting away at this mindless life right now. The feeling of despair and frustration that sets in everyday as soon as I wake up. People around me keep saying that I just need to give it some time. Maybe its the economy and that soon we will be out of this recession. Things should start looking up soon and I get that. I am waiting for that time when everything will be good. There is calm in my mind for five minutes before the looming presence of despair and feeling of hopelessness creeps back in.

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Countless resume to companies to get that perfect engineering job. Countless hours trying to perfect that resume. Networking (just short of begging) has become a word that I have come to hate. It seems like whatever I do, its not grabbing anyone’s attention. Sometimes I fantasize about living somewhere far away from the civilization and just LIVE.

Today a sudden panic attack made me realize that if I keep waiting for things to “look up”; I might be wasting the precious time that could be used for my other ambitious wants. Starting with simple things like getting back into the habit of reading and writing to bigger things like starting my own business. FYI: My goal was to start a consultancy after I have gained experience and my P.Eng.

As a painfully shy person I always wanted to know how it feels like to step out of my comfort zone of being in front of the world (internet). Yes, I am so shy that even sitting behind a computer and writing made me cringe.  I decided that I am going to do just that. Work on myself until I can get a job in my field. Work on business ideas that I used to think about during my university years. Try something different than the path that I thought would lead to a happy life.

So here I am writing this blog on an online platform for anyone if interested to read. All I am saying is that sometimes you are your own worst enemy; and the only way out is to challenge yourself to do the impossible.

Would love to hear from you all about how you deal with similar situations!

Talk to me, send me an email or just message me Hi!

Lots of love,


Purpose (Lazy – ing in)

Woohoo first post ever! Who would have thought that I would be putting my laziness out for the world to see. This is a kick on my butt to get things done though. SO forgive me, if you thought this blog would be about lifestyle. We might have some of those, so bear with me while I get my life in order.

I believe everyone has a lazy but very confusing phase. I am seeing that especially now that I am going through this confusing phase. You know the phase,the one right after university and that dream career (or any career, I say) as day by day I become more desperate for my bank account to go in the positive direction. So what do you do?

Trust me when I say, I work hard if I am given work. And I did work. However, somewhere during the last five years of my life, I started questioning why am I working so hard? Who am I working so hard for? Myself? My parents? My SO? My future kids? To tell you the truth, that scares me. I figured I needed to find my purpose in life to answer that question. Now I am not an overtly religious person. I believe sometimes.

But, who decided that we had to follow a certain path to be successful at “just living”. I followed it blindly. If I made a mistake during this path, I beat myself up. It was hard to be someone that fit into this perfect mold that others made. So many thoughts that I thought I was loosing my mind trying to find this perfect me with a purpose and working towards that perfect life dictated by many before me.